anal sex

Two studies about the safety of lubricant use during anal intercourse were presented last week at the 2010 International Microbicides Conference in Pittsburgh. The data from the studies has yet to be published, but there have already been several write-ups about the research , which at first blush seem to suggest that using lubricant might be found to be associated with an increased risk of STDs. As Jim Pickett, the chair of the International Rectal Microbicide Advocates (IRMA) one of the organizations involved in putting on the conference, said to me in an email, what is key is that this research be discussed and interpreted without hyperbole. If you're confused by what you've read so far, you're not alone. Let's start with the research itself.

One was a laboratory study of six popular lubricants used during anal intercourse. Actually only five of them are popular for anal intercourse (Astroglide, Elbow Grease, ID Glide, KY Jelly and Wet Platinum), the sixth (Pre) was used because it is isotonic (more on that below). The popular lubricants were chosen based on a large global survey which asked over 9,000 people about lubricant use during anal sex. Researchers did not report on which specific style of each product was used in the research, but in one write up I read that the “basic formulation” was used from each brand. (Interesting side note from my years in sex shops: the lubricant Pre is a lubricant made specifically for women trying to conceive. In addition to being isotonic, it is the only lubricant on the market that is specifically designed not to harm sperm).

The overall purpose of the study was to see if lubricant might play a role in increasing risk of STD transmission during anal intercourse. To this end, the researchers wanted to understand what, if any, direct damage lubricants might have on rectal and cervical tissue. They also wanted to see how the lubricants might impact healthy bacteria that are present in the rectum. There are, of course, many ways to damage rectal tissue. In this study the researchers focused on one particular effect which can damage the tissue in the rectum essentially by drying up cells, causing them to die and slough off. This can happen if the lubricant being used has higher concentrations of salts and sugars than are found in the skin cells it comes in contact with. The lubricant can draw water out of the cells, resulting in damage that can increase risk of infection (the science minded among you can find more detailed explanations here, here, or here).

. . .

A second study looked at the use of lubricants during anal intercourse outside the laboratory. This study included 229 men who had reported having receptive anal intercourse in the past month, and 192 women who reported having receptive anal intercourse in the past year. Participants completed a computer assisted self-interview about sexual behavior. Among other things, participants were asked about use (or non-use) of lubricants and the particular brands they used during anal sex. From that group, 302 participants also had rectal tests for chlamydia and gonorrhea. Most of the participants reported using lubricant the last time they had receptive anal intercourse. Of the 302 participants, 25 tested positive for an anal STD. More than two-thirds of the people diagnosed with an STD reported using lube the last time they had receptive anal intercourse, compared with one third of people who had not used a lube. Read another way, people who reported using lubricants the last time they had anal sex were about twice as likely to have chlamydia or gonorrhea as those who did not use lubricants.

More. . .

ANAL SEX POSITION GUIDE Guest Review: The Anal Sex Positions Guide by Tristan Taormino
The Anal Sex Positions Guide: The Best Positions for Easy, Exciting, Mind-Blowing Pleasure by Tristan Taormino

by Wendy Blackheart
So, the first thing I noticed about this book is that at first, it comes across as aimed towards cisgendered/heterosexual vanilla couples. Which makes sense, since really, that’s the demographic that needs a book on anal sex positions, which, IMO, isn’t rocket science.

Personally, I would have liked it if there was more of a broad demo, leaning a little more queer. I especially would have liked some queer models for the photos, but hey, that’s me, what can I say? And again: the demo seems to be cis-hetero-vanilla. Though a little bit of the BDSM leaks through in some of the comments made about power dynamics of different positions.

The first section of the book covers the anal sex basics – the hows and whys, lube, communication, etc. Its a great condensation of the info in Tristan’s ‘Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex For Women’. Not everyone who picks up this book is going to have a solid grounding in the how to’s of butt-loving, so this is excellent information to have!

Also covered in a later chapter are toys, and safety issues with them – the biggest one, IMO, is using a toy with a handle or flared base. It constantly amazes me that people don’t think of that on their own, but if they don’t want to go to the hospital and explain why they got whatever they got stuck in their butt stuck up there…they’ll get something with a flared base.  Tristan also shares my dislike of anal beads made of hard plastic and string – icky! Too hard to clean, and too easy to break. There are sooo many nicer types of anal beads out there, and she shows a variety of pictures of toys for people, so they can know what they’re looking for. Or at. Buying toys can be intimidating, especially if you don’t know what you’re looking for and haven’t ever bought, or even seen, a sex or butt toy before!

I particularly loved that Tristan repeatedly mentioned that, for men, attempting to ‘slip in’ the back door without consent is totally not cool. Having heard stories of that from my friends in the past, I know it does happen. That is the absolute *worst* way to get someone to have the buttsechs with you!

I also love that in the commentary about each position, along with including information like how well the position is for skin to skin contact, or communication, she also covers how the position works, or doesn’t, for those who are larger, have mobility issues, or who may not be as physically strong as others.  This is *excellent* information to have about a position, and this is the first book of sex positions of any type that I’ve read that talks about those issues. (And I’ve read quite a few books about sex positions. I wish someone told me that after four minutes in doggy style I’d be face down, ass up, and hugging a pillow until I built up the upper arm strength to hold it. This is information I would have liked to have known as a teen!) Though I did notice another bit of info I would have liked when I was a newly budding ass queen hadn’t been mentioned – when fucking a man in the ass, make sure you know where his balls are. I still remember the first time I whacked a mans balls with out meaning to because I was enthusiastically fucking him, and he had low hangers. icon smile Guest Review: The Anal Sex Positions Guide by Tristan Taormino Maybe guys fucking other guys figure this out on their own, but I had to learn from experience.

An excellent section of the book, towards the end, covers how to choose the ‘best’ position for anal sex. Tristan points out that for everyone, this is different. Hell, on different days, different positions are better. She talks about communication, comfort, sexual/power dynamics, access to different body parts and other topics briefly, and suggests a few positions/variations that are best for each issues. (See my doggy style/arm strength issue above icon smile Guest Review: The Anal Sex Positions Guide by Tristan Taormino

Another thing I enjoy that was carried over from the Guide are the snippets of anal erotica and short fiction included throughout the book. I luuuurved that part of the Guide, and I love it here!

Overall, I think this is a great intro to butt sex book – it covers what I find to be one of the most common questions I’m asked about anal from anal newbies – ‘what position should I try?’I think this is also an excellent book for people looking to try anal the first time, or who are new to it. For me, I find it to be a nice reference, something I can show people when I need to explain a bit of information to them. Its not quite as in depth about anal as Tristan’s ‘Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women’ in terms of anatomy and such, and it doesn’t go over fisting or other extreme anal practices, but as I said, this is a book for beginners. Us anal-sluts all had to start somewhere, and this is a great place to start!

bend over boyfriend dvd Bend Over Boyfriend

Bend Over Boyfriend (1998)
Studio- Fatale Media
Director- Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano
Cast- Dr. Carol Queen, Robert Morgan, Laura Goodhue, Cupcake Jones, Greg Heiman, Troy, Miss Behavin’

Bend Over Boyfriend came out in 1998 and was the first and only instructional video of its kind to introduce anal pleasure for men, through strap-on sex with a female partner.  Although today the film seems a bit dated, compared to newer films of the same topic, like Tristan Taormino’s “Expert Guides”, at the time of its launch the film was groundbreaking and has remained one of the best-selling videos on this topic of all time.

While I have read some praise for the film, I have also read some criticism including that it is “too instructional”, “not erotic”, and that it has an “infomercial quality and the officious attention to every detail”.  This makes me wonder what people think an instructional film is.  I mean really.  I don’t expect instructional films about sex to be erotic, or to lack instruction.  I want them to teach me something in the simplest way possible.  I want the people presenting the topic—in this case Dr. Carol Queen and Robert Morgan—to be enthusiastic, knowledgeable and experienced, and to provide details, even if they are not always relevant to me.  I don’t necessarily want to be entertained or aroused by the content, or expect it to get an Academy Award.  I want to learn something new.  If I wanted to just watch people fuck, I’d rent a porno.

Now, I’ll admit that academics are often a bit dry.  After all, Carol Queen is not an actor, but an educator, although she does know and present her topic better than any actor could.  And, while she does recommend products at the end of the film and where to buy them (read: resources), I think it is certainly useful if the general public doesn’t have a clue about anal dildos or strap-ons, which was certainly the case back in 1998.  And, let’s remember that sex shops were not always as sex-positive or as helpful with knowledgeable staff as they are today.

I think Bend Over Boyfriend is a great film and it is easy to see why it has had such longevity.  Carol and Robert are passionate about their topic and very experienced.  They talk about anatomy, prostate pleasure and health, relaxation and massage, safe sex, arousal, gender-bending, and the best tools for anal stimulation (including mouth, tongue and fingers!).  After this ten minute intro, they show you enthusiastically how it is done (and while this is probably not erotic for the viewer, I bet it was for them).  The film also includes two other male/female couples that demonstrate different scenarios, variations of anal pleasure and sexual positions.  So Bend Over Boyfriend was an excellent guide when it first came out, and today I believe it still has information that is valuable to share, especially for couples seeking to explore anal sex for men and gender-bending for the first time.

Thank you to Babeland for this trip down memory lane.  Be sure to check out Bend Over Boyfriend and all the other excellent instructional films they have in their store as well as their Bend Over Boyfriend Strap-on Kit.

Ducky delivers a butt sex basics sex ed episode for Cherry TV.

….unhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

The thickness all of a sudden was slid into me. Fully and completely. The pain and pleasure hitting me equally. My ass being penetrated quickly and fast. It was amazing. Intense. The initial pain subsided as they left the thickness deep inside me. Letting me adjust to it. I pushed myself further back, taking it as far as a could. A deep and guttural moan escaped from my mouth. It was exactly what I wanted and needed. I didn’t care who and how, but it’s what I needed.

They slowly eased the thickness out of me. My ass savored every centimeter of it. And just before it was out it was shoved deep back into me.

“Yes. Please. Ah.”

I needed more. Sensing it. They started to pull out again. Quicker this time. Again pushing back in deep and hard. The pace quickened. The thickness fucking me now with deep and deliberate penetrations. The strokes were smooth and measured. The intensity building every so slightly.

Two hands grabbed my hips and pulled me up onto my knees. Holding my hips the thrusts were deeper and harder. My face on the bed. Moaning deeply and loudly. Begging for more.

“Fuck me. Take me. Yes. More. Harder.”

Link.