Melamine risk spreads, so to speak… (Reuters)
Oct 21st, 2025 by Viviane
By Laura MacInnis
GENEVA (Reuters) - Chocolate-flavored body spreads sold in British sex shops have been found to be tainted with melamine, the chemical that made thousands of babies ill in China, food safety authorities said Monday.
The British Food Standards Agency (FSA) said melamine had been found in Chinese-made “I Love You” sets, sold at Ann Summers sex shops, containing chocolate and strawberry body pens and chocolate-flavored penis and nipple spreads.
“This is a first. We’ve never had to put out an alert before on ‘willy spread’ — chocolate-flavored or otherwise,” the FSA said on its Web site, www.foodstandards.gov.uk.
It said the health risk from the affected products was low.
At least four children died in China and thousands of others were treated in hospital after consuming milk powder containing melamine, an industrial compound added to cheat quality tests.
Dozens of countries have since banned imports of Chinese dairy ingredients and recalled products ranging from cookies to herbal drugs and octopus dumplings.
Peter Ben Embarek, a food safety expert at the World Health Organization (WHO), said national authorities needed to widen their checks and tests.
“Milk powder is a very common ingredient in a very large range of products, from candies to biscuits, chocolates, drinks, and so on and so on,” he said.
The levels of melamine detected in the “I Love You” sets, manufactured in China by Le Bang and imported into Britain by Scobie (Llarn) Ltd, ranged from 126 milligrams per kg to 259 milligrams per kg, the FSA said.
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I guess it feels more properly romantic to some people to buy these “I love you” sets to smear all over each other. For me, if you really want to say “I love you,” then do it with a home cooked meal.
Melt dark chocolate kisses to taste in some coconut oil until it’s just the right flavour, but don’t add too much chocolate because you want the coconut oil to be able to melt again when it comes in contact with body heat. I recommend adding stevia for sweetness because you only need a tiny bit compared to processed sugar - and it’s also healthier.
Allow your coconut chocolate spread to solidify and keep it in a glass jar next to your bed. When it’s time for fun, just start spreading the flavour around. The coconut oil melts almost instantly when it contacts the body. The medium chain triglycerides give you extra energy and the xanthine from the chocolate gives you extra euphoria.
You can also substitute pineapple juice for the chocolate and sugar, so you can have a pina colada spread.
If you want to make it official, just put an “I Love You” sticker on the jar.