The Best of “The Best of Craigslist
Aug 7th, 2025 by Viviane
About ‘The Best of Craigslist’
* Postings are nominated by craigslist readers, and are not necessarily endorsed by craigslist staff.
* Postings may be explicitly sexual, scatalogical, offensive, graphic, tasteless, and/or not funny
Why I no longer want to have sex
“It has taken me 9 years of unsatisfactory sex to realize that men are clueless in bed and that my time will be much better spent pleasuring myself. I am aware that I will be spending a lot more money on AA batteries and I have come to terms with that. I will still be saving money, by not having to buy condoms.
I just want to make it clear that it is not that I cannot have an orgasm, I have them all the time, just not with someone else in the room, it is just that guys do not get what it takes to get a woman off.”
To all my clients….from your friendly online porn store
“I have run an online adult goodies store for about 3 years now. To say the least, I have run into some interesting characters in my 3 years of online smut-pandering. I am about to end my run of naughty knick-knacks and I’d just like to give a wee shout-out to the people who struck me as the most interesting, funny, annoying and downright memorable. Here goes nothing….”
Rave: Planned Parenthood
“The nurse, without missing a beat, said “You know what, have as many partners as you want! Just practice safe sex!” and opened up a medicine cabinet. “Here are a few for the road!” she chirped, dumping rolls of condoms in a little goody bag with pamphlets she had sitting on the table next to my chart. Shocked that someone can be so accepting, I stuttered and said “Just how many do you think I need?!” She smiled and said “As many as it takes!” I was speechless. Thank you, nurse practioner. You rock. You were absolutely wonderful today. You not only had an outstanding bedside manner that more than a few doctors should acquire but you also showed genuine kindness and understanding that is so rarely seen anywhere today, much less in medical profession. Most of all, thank you for not judging and thank you for supporting me. “Wanted: STONER BOYFRIEND
“Where are all the cool hippy guys out there? I would drive to Santa Cruz, park my fine ass in a park, playing my ukulele, eating tofu jerky, waving a clear baggy of catnip tied to a stick and spend a day trying to lure a cool stoner to join me on my blanket of love…,but I have a real 8-5 job and can’t afford that luxury. So where do I find one of you earthenware brothas?”
To the Doms of DC - w4m
“In the nine months I have lived in DC I have met and corresponded with a number of you, and frankly I am a little disappointed with the men in this area who call themselves Doms. I find it hard to believe that in a city based on the power of politics that at least a few of you can’t step up to the plate and get the whole BDSM thing right. Since you all seem to be having a difficult time with this I thought I would give you a few guidelines to make your search for your own submissive princess more successful. I am only giving you this input out of love, no one wants to see you succeed more than I do dear, so please read carefully.