The Best of ‘The Best of Craigslist’
Jan 3rd, 2025 by Viviane
About ‘The Best of Craigslist’
- Postings are nominated by craigslist readers, and are not necessarily endorsed by craigslist staff.
- Postings may be explicitly sexual, scatalogical, offensive, graphic, tasteless, and/or not funny
I see penises. (New York)
“While the fall has been unseasonably warm, I have faith that it will soon be too cold for the penises to come out.”
Life, Circumcision, and the Cannon (Seattle-Tacoma)
“Being the first person we had come upon who would admit to having a meat tulip, we were intrigued and my colleague started asking him some questions. These questions were about fundamental mechanics of operating an uncircumcised penis, i.e. sex, hygiene, etc. I am no doctor, but Jiminy’s answers did not make any sense. Physiologically, the answers did not add up. Upon further questioning involving some rudimentary diagrams, the following became clear: Jiminy Bonerpants was and is circumcised, but he did not know this.”
197 Reasons to date me (SF)
“149. I’ve never smuggled drugs out of the country
150. I don’t care if you eat dinner without a shirt
151. I think it’s hot when you masturbate”
Trannies at the Gym (SF/Bay Area)
“Please don’t come in all full of sassy attitude. Some of us do speak Spanish, and we do know what you’re saying. And those who don’t speak Spanish can tell from the looks on your faces and the tones of your voice. A bitch is a bitch is a bitch in any language or gender orientation. We don’t whisper and glare at you for using the ladies locker room…we know it’s your only option.”
Dear Guy Masterbating In Enoch Pratt (Baltimore)
“Firstly, I would consider moving to the bathroom. You’re less likely to be interrupted by nerdly Graduate Students researching Ancient Mesopotamia. If you have to continue doing it standing up in a library aisle. At least prep yourself for quick put-away-ability.”
Oh, the men I have met off CRAIGSLIST…(SF/Bay Area)
“34 MEN. Yes, that’s right, I’ve met 34 men off of CL. No joke. NO, I have not had sex with all of them, but I could have. I’ve gotten over 3500 responses in the past 6 months, from ads that I have posted, and I have met about 8 from ads that I responded to. I know most people reading this will think I’m full of shit, but it’s all true. I don’t know if I can do them all justice in this little post, but I’ll try my best. SO NOW.. WITHOUT FURTHER ADO.. THE MEN I’VE MET OFF CRAIGSLIST.”
craigslist, nyc, sanfrancisco, seattle